It can be especially hard for men to hold space for their partner's upset. There is so much societal and cultural conditioning around masculinity being associated with strength that men often don't feel comfortable with emotional expression. We often hear, "I don’t know what to do when my partner gets upset." At the beginning of our relationship, Angus would rush to try to fix things when I would be sad. He would try and escape his feelings of vulnerability when faced with my tears by doing his best to make me feel better, but when that didn't work or I would eventually get mad because he couldn't hold space for me he would end up feeling angry and resentful. Fortunately for me, Angus realized that he didn't need to do anything when I get emotionally imbalanced. He can trust that I will naturally stabilize and the kindest thing he can do if he has the bandwidth to do it, is hold space for me when I am upset. No fixing is needed just compassion and understanding.