This is a guest blog post written by Jessie Marcus.
I don’t know about you but when change comes along quite often my first reaction is not a welcoming embrace. I have found myself over the years resisting, asking why, and throwing tantrums when a change comes that I am not prepared for or thrilled to experience. It can be little changes or big ones; I treat them all with equanimity, and my response quite often is a resounding “oh hell no!”
Growing up it appeared as if having control would make me the master of my own life. If I could manipulate things to go my way and stay that way, I would win the game of life and minimize my suffering. I’ve spent hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars exploring the many ways to control change; belief systems, lifestyle changes, holding on tightly to people and things, to name a few, all yielding less than satisfactory results. Many years and many changes later I’ve come to reconsider that approach and ask myself, is it really the changes that are so uncomfortable or how I am defining them in the moment?
The most dramatic example in my life was when I recently “changed” from a healthy person to a sick person by a health crisis that impacted every aspect of my life. I found myself in what was to me a high stakes situation, not knowing how much change I could handle or how. And then in the midst of some wonderful conversations and unexplainable grace I began to have insights and a deeper understanding of what was actually taking place. I found an anchor in my breath and started releasing the grip I had on my thoughts that were labeling what was happening to me. In that spaciousness I remembered change is a natural state in life and is my ally.
When I was confined by the definitions of my condition everything felt painful, desperate, and permanent. It was immediate fear and suffering, providing me feedback that I was locked into my thoughts. Yet when I would connect with my natural state in moment-to-moment awareness, I remembered that change is the constant and having that recognition actually brought me hope and healing. If everything is in a state of motion and flow then even my physical disturbance and my thoughts about it were going to change. We are not fixed beings in body, mind, or soul and that means the possibilities for expansion, creativity, and possibility are unlimited.
“This too shall pass” my mother always said, wisdom I didn’t really understand at the time. Whether it is physical discomfort or my limiting beliefs, when I allow myself to feel fully and let them move through me it alters every aspect of my experience. And when I make the connection that holding on to my thinking about something is contributing to my being stuck in it, I am closer to the possibility of remembering my true nature and the peaceful place within.
The point isn’t to avoid or eliminate any of what I feel along the way, including the discomfort, but to welcome all aspects of my humanity and dance with all the rhythms in my life. To be able to move with relative ease from one situation to another has opened me up to a more curious experience of life and left room to be able to listen to my intuition and creative thinking. Let’s dance!
Jessie spent the last two decades as an award-winning television producer known for her ingenuity, positive outlook, calm disposition, and sense of humor -- all valuable skills when working with networks, studios, and agency people with strong personalities in high pressure situations.
Having completed a three-year Master’s Program in Spiritual Psychology in 2010, Jessie began studying the Three Principles, a psychological understanding that points to the inside-out nature of life, adding more tools to her bag of tricks which helped her navigate the fast paced, quick turnaround, world of production.
In June of 2020, four months into the pandemic, Jessie received a cancer diagnosis that presented challenges and opportunities unlike any she had faced before. With the support of many and a constant open and curious approach to what life was offering, Jessie has successfully completed treatment and is experiencing radiant health! This life changing experience has increased her ability to relate to and empathize with others as well as perform her work in the world.
Most recently Jessie launched her personal mentoring practice as well as creative expression immersion gatherings called ArtNSoul.
Rohini Ross is co-founder of “The Rewilders.” Listen to her podcast, with her partner Angus Ross, Rewilding Love. They believe too many good relationships fall apart because couples give up thinking their relationship problems can’t be solved. In this season of the Rewilding Love Podcast, Rohini and Angus help a couple on the brink of divorce due to conflict. Angus and Rohini also co-facilitate private couples’ intensives retreat program that rewild relationships back to their natural state of love. Rohini is also the author of the ebook Marriage, and she and Angus are co-founders of The 29-Day Rewilding Experience and The Rewilding Community. You can follow Rohini on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. To learn more about her work and subscribe to her blog visit: TheRewilders.org.