Rohini shares how she blamed Angus for many years for making her feel bad. She believed that he needed to change in order for her to feel better, but ultimately this was a disempowering misunderstanding. Angus was never responsible for how she felt. Feelings are a reflection of the thoughts we identify with in the moment. Angus acknowledges there can be many "yeah-buts" that can come around this subject, but what was freeing for us, and ultimately saved our relationship, was seeing that the other person's behavior is a reflection of their state of mind. It isn't personal. This doesn't mean we condone bad behavior. We encourage everyone to make self-honoring choices by listening to commonsense and inner wisdom. And, it is liberating to recognize that our wellbeing and peace of mind cannot be taken away from us by another person or circumstance. They are always within us undamaged and unchanging. Seeing this was a game-changer in our relationship.
Angus & Rohini Ross are “The Rewilders.” Listen to their podcast Rewilding Love. They believe too many good relationships fall apart because couples give up thinking their relationship problems can’t be solved. Many couples don’t know how to navigate low moods, conflict, and emotional reactivity. In this season of the Rewilding Love Podcast, Rohini and Angus help a couple on the brink of divorce due to conflict. Angus and Rohini love working with couples and helping them to reduce conflict and discord in their relationships by pointing them to their innate wisdom and wellbeing. They work with couples who are struggling and couples who would like to deepen the love and intimacy they already have. They co-facilitate private couples' intensives that rewild relationships back to their natural state of love.
Rohini is the author of the ebook Marriage, and they are co-founders of The 29-Day Rewilding Experience and The Rewilding Community. You can also follow Angus and Rohini Ross on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. To learn more about their work visit: TheRewilders.org.