I learned the hard way that emotional safety is what allows for open, honest, authentic communication in relationships. At the beginning of our relationship, my rigidity and judgment did not create the fertile ground for Angus to talk about his struggle with drugs. Rather than this increasing intimacy, it created a wall between us. Honesty flourishes in the container of love and compassion where each person can be fully heard and understood even when there isn’t agreement. From this place of understanding, polarization dissolves, and hopefulness and possibility can bloom. Fortunately, we got better at this over the years. We encourage you to explore this now. How good are you at holding a safe space for your loved ones to fully express their experience even, and especially, when you don’t agree with them?
Angus & Rohini Ross are “the Rewilders.” They love working with couples and helping them to reduce conflict and discord in their relationships by pointing them to their innate wisdom and understanding. They work with couples who are struggling and couples who would like to deepen the love and intimacy they already have. They co-facilitate individualized couples intensives that rewild relationships back to their natural state of love. Rohini is the author of the free ebook Marriage, and they are co-founders of The 29-Day Rewilding Experience and The Rewilding Community. You can also follow Rohini on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. To learn more about her work go to her website, www.rewilders.org.