I have been incredibly blessed with two back-to-back exquisite weekends. Last weekend I spent time with the Rewilder Mentor Guides who were completing their small group program with me. It was three days filled with love and healing. A deep dive into sharing from our hearts giving and receiving. Each one of the guides got to sit in the love seat and share their wisdom, receive love and feel the love of who they are more deeply. And this weekend I got to spend time in-person with my Mastermind group in beautiful Oregon dropping deeply into love and truth, giving and receiving, connecting and sharing, opening and softening.
These two experiences have been incredibly heart-opening for me. A reminder to remember who I am and to live at a pace and a rhythm that allows me to honor that feeling of love that lies within me. At this slower pace, I notice I am kinder, gentler, more affectionate, and more loving. I tear up more easily and feel my heart swell as I am moved by life.
I don’t know if this tenderness will last or if my conditioning is going to creep in and cover up my heart, but while I am in this heartfelt state I thought I would ask you to reflect on a time when you were broken open. Perhaps it was at the birth of a child, a wedding, a loss, a reconciliation, an act of courage, caring for a loved one. Whatever comes to mind that reminds you of that feeling of your heart being open.
Allow yourself to rest in this space and to feel the inner expansion the memory and the feeling bring. The feeling isn’t happening in the past. It is happening in the present moment. It is here now.
What do you notice?
Can you relax into this space?
There is nothing to do to get here. It is right there. You fall into it.
I guess that is why they call it falling in love.
Instead of falling in love with someone, give yourself permission to just fall into love. The experience of love. The knowing of love. The wisdom of love.
Here is a reminder from the Beatles:
As Wayne Dyer said, “Whatever the question, love is the answer.”
All you need is love can sound like a trite answer, but I want you to consider the truth of this. Or perhaps better said, feel the truth of this.
The love I am talking about is the expanded state of consciousness that is available to each one of us. From this state, we see more clearly and live according to that clarity.
Listening to that space of love within and following the guidance from that knowing within ourselves is practical. It will give us ideas, courage, strength, wisdom, and guidance. Whatever we need.
The question is, “Are you listening?”
I mentioned in a recent post that Angus and I went through a rough patch recently. I can see the innocence of me taking his low mood personally and feeling hurt in the process. I can see how my heart closed and how I distanced myself. After the Mastermind weekend, I can see how I did this with work as well on the administrative side. I withdrew feeling I needed to be different or better.
But as I listen now to what my heart says I see that I can love myself as I am. There is nothing wrong with me. I don’t need to take other people's low moods, insecurities, and frailties personally. I learned the coping mechanisms of caretaking and shaping myself to meet others’ needs.
Now my heart says, "Be your shape. Take up your space. Find the fit that works for you." Pleasing others has felt safe, but it is time to align with myself, honor who I am, and do what makes sense to me. This might not feel safe, but it feels good.
Rather than withdrawing I can open my heart and share fully what is present. I don’t need to change myself. I can express myself and be true to myself. I can make self-honoring choices rather than people-pleasing.
What does the wisdom of your heart want you to know?
Drop into that feeling of who you are and listen to what you need to hear in this moment and stay in the conversation as much and as long as you can.
We can resist listening to the voice of the heart because of the challenges in life and the atrocities in the world, but as Father Richard Rohr said in The Root of Violence, “To end the cycle of violence, our actions must flow from our authentic identity as Love."
It is through remembering who we are that the answers reveal themselves. And it is in coming together that we can help remind each other.
Who are you going to remind today that their nature is love, and how are you going to remind them?
Rohini Ross is co-founder of “The Rewilders.” Listen to her podcast, with her partner Angus Ross, Rewilding Love. They believe too many good relationships fall apart because couples give up thinking their relationship problems can’t be solved. In the first season of the Rewilding Love Podcast, Rohini and Angus help a couple on the brink of divorce due to conflict. Angus and Rohini also co-facilitate private couple's intensive retreat programs that rewild relationships back to their natural state of love. Rohini is also the author of the ebook Marriage, and she and Angus are co-founders of The 29-Day Rewilding Experience and The Rewilders Community. You can follow Rohini on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. To learn more about her work and subscribe to her blog visit: TheRewilders.org.