We have separate realities around household chores. Angus is “visually sensitive.” Rohini likes to leave things out as a reminder to do them. Angus feels like the kitchen sometimes looks like a Salvador Dali nightmare and would rather it be more in the theme of a Renoir. Add teenagers into the mix and feelings around household chores can run high. What we have found helpful to remember is, if you are in a low mood, do not take your thinking seriously. Instead, put the oxygen mask on yourself first.

We do our best not to engage in problem-solving from a low state of mind and wait until we are feeling more warm and open. Then we have a green light to explore possible solutions. From that state of mind and feeling it so much easier to see the myriad of possibilities that are available. This is only possible when it doesn’t look and feel like our wellbeing and peace of mind are at stake.

Angus & Rohini Ross are “the Rewilders.” They love working with couples and helping them to reduce conflict and discord in their relationships by pointing them to their innate wisdom and understanding. They work with couples who are struggling and couples who would like to deepen the love and intimacy they already have. They co-facilitate individualized couples intensives that rewild relationships back to their natural state of love. Rohini is the author of the free ebook Marriage, and they are co-founders of The 29-Day Rewilding Experience and The Rewilding Community. You can also follow Rohini on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. To learn more about her work go to her website, www.rewilders.org.